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Emily Akers (@emilyakers.jpg)

Hi! I'm Cara Michelle Smith—a writer and comedian living in New York.

My satire and short humor’s been published in The New Yorker, The Onion, McSweeney’s and other places. I've modernized horror movie tropes, designed a retirement community for millennials and reviewed your dad’s HBO special (he did great!).

I also write OBSESSED, a Substack about hyperfixations  looks like me applying academic rigor to absurdist pop culture theories: Was every single male character in Fallout written for the male gaze? Jacob Elordi and Barry Keoghan are Aragorn and Legolas — but which one’s which? And look, I’m sorry, but why is this lady heterosexual?

I've spent 10 years reporting on housing and real estate development for various publications in Houston, Chicago and New York. My work's been syndicated in Yahoo! Finance, Marketwatch and The Houston Chronicle.  

I love to talk about anything and everything. The best way to reach me is via email: (Don't leave off the "m"!)

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